Anger Management
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Paul is running in
"high gear". When he walked into the
office this morning,
he found his desk covered with stacks
of reports to review -
a "gift" from his boss ten minutes
before. His voice mail
has over seven messages left by callers.
He has a 9 A.M. meeting with potential clients, and then must catch a
plane at the airport before 11 A.M. As
the phone continues to
ring, and fellow workers stop by to discuss problems, Paul feels tension
in the muscles of his
back and neck. He is
sweating. His
heart is palpitating, and
his headache is
intensifying. He feels totally overwhelmed
by the non-stop demands
made on him, and the impossibility
of meeting everyone's expectations. Stress is
taking its toll
STRESS - WHAT IS IT?
Stress is a feeling of
tension, of being overwhelmed
and threatened. Following are some of its major characteristics:
It Arises
from a Demand
Stress is
triggered when a demand is placed on us – for
example, to meet a
tight work schedule,
produce more than we
think we can reasonably
do, to meet a spouse's expectations,
or to rise to the level
of "perfection" demanded
by our own inner selves. This demand
feels overwhelming, and we fear that
we cannot meet its
expectations.
It Affects the Body
When the mind
fears
something and feels overwhelmed, the
body's muscles tighten.
Blood pressure rises. Adrenal glands pump to give added strength and
quickened heart activity. Blood
flows from the periphery of the body to vital organs,
leaving hands and fingers cold. The skin becomes
clammy, and the body sweats The digestive system
shuts down to preserve energy, and the body produces
more red blood cells. The body mobilizes itself
to fight an enemy. This heightened
physical response produces
symptoms. Among the most commonly found signs of stress are:
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Headaches
Overeating
Tiredness |
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Digestive problems |
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Tense neck and back muscles |
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Quick and shallow breathing |
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Nervousness or jittering |
| Lack of appetite |
| Insomnia |
It
is Non-Specific
Stress is a response which varies
from
one person to another. It varies too even within
an
individual, depending on what circumstances he or
she
is facing
LONG TERM EFFECTS
OF STRESS
When we experience a
stressful situation, our body reactions
mobilize to prepare us for "fight". As the threatening event subsides, the
body returns to its normal state of non-arousal.
Stressful situations can arise
two, three or ten times a
day, and our bodies
automatically shift into high gear. Over years and many
repeated arousal's, our bodies
become immune. They no
longer recognize excessive levels of
stress. An elevated level of
tension becomes "normal".
With this people begin to develop chronic high blood pressure and are
prone to heart disease. Others become susceptible to ulcers, spastic
colon or other
gastrointestinal disorders.
LEARN TO COPE WITH
STRESS
Keep Your Life in Perspective.
Spend some time each
day focusing on
what is really
important to you.
Take a big and broad look at your
life and your innermost goals. By
taking the "big
look", you can put many small annoying
things that build
up stress into proper perspective. Suddenly,
what seemed so troublesome can disappear into
oblivion where
it no longer gives you tension.
Examine and Change Your Lifestyle
If you
take a
good
look at your overall lifestyle, you might find things
that are inviting stress to
take mastery over you. Change
destructive habits and replace them with positive ones. A
few of the lifestyle changes you
might consider are listed below:
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Ask yourself what makes you tense and frustrated. If
you can, avoid these
stress-inviting events. (For example,
if you find it difficult to drive in rush hour traffic,
see
if there is a way you can go to and from work at different hours.)
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Reduce the amount of noise you arc exposed to.
Work
with your own energy rhythms. If you are a
"morning person" do your most difficult work then.
Do
it at the end of day if you are a "night person".
Plan
your time in advance. Prioritize activities. Realistically
eliminate whatever is too much.
Schedule a little extra time for each activity. This
will leave time for unexpected events. Learn to say "No!" to persons who
put too much pressure
on you.
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Examine your own attitudes. You may be your own worst enemy by putting
too much pressure on yourself.
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Exercise regularly in some vigorous activity - swimming,
jogging, etc. Exercise helps eliminate stored-up
tension.
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Eliminate smoking and nicotine from your lifestyle
habits. Both contribute to a stress response in the
body.
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| Improve your diet.
Reduce salt. Eat plenty of fruits,
vegetables and grains.
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| Have an "escape
activity", a hobby which is strictly
for your own enjoyment.
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Have an "escape place" - a room, spot in your yard or garden, etc. where
you can be alone and away from
pressure.
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Schedule relaxation and fun into your schedule on a
regular basis.
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Develop a network of people whom you love and who
care
about you. Share your love and concern with
them, knowing they will support you when you are in
need. |
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If you feel pressure because other people take advantage of you, take a
course in self-assertiveness |
Learn Relaxation Techniques
Researchers tell us that just as
we can
make ourselves sick, so too can we make ourselves
well.
To control stress we can learn to re-define life events and
we can
learn to train our bodies to achieve a relaxed non-aroused
state.
Following are some relaxation techniques which can help us remain calm,
even in stress-filled situations.
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Imaging
Find a place where you can be alone for
a few minutes, even in the most stressful of days. Sit in a comfortable
position. Keep your body still and your eyes
closed. Take
five full breaths, and exhale slowly. Vividly
image your body
relaxing as you talk to each part. Start
with the top of
your head and tell it to relax, then your forehead,
eyes, neck, back, etc. - until you reach your toes.
Maintain the
inward quiet for a few minutes. Close by taking five full breaths as you
did at the start. Stretch and feel
Calm energy return
to your body.
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Breathing
Many people under
stress breath with a shoulder-chest
motion. This way of breathing builds tension,
particularly in the neck and shoulders. To breathe correctly
sit
comfortably with legs uncrossed. Place one hand on
your
chest and the other on your diaphragm. Breathe so
that
when you inhale, the hand covering your diaphragm
moves out. The other hand on your chest should remain
still. Practice correct breathing for five minutes two to
three rimes a day until you have re-trained yourself and
overcome bad
breathing habits. |
| Professional
Help
Sometimes daily stresses
have accumulated to the point that
we need professional help in dealing with them. Licensed
counselors can help us see what
stressors are impacting us most and how we can react to
them differently. They can also
guide us in incorporating
stress reduction techniques into our daily lifestyle patterns. |
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