THE ART OF RELAXATION

Anger Management

Consider the following two situations -

It is Friday evening.  You are driving the freeway in bumper -to- bumper traffic.  The day is stifling hot, and the air conditioner is not working properly.  You are exhausted!  All day the phones at work rang incessantly.  Your boss blew up at you for not getting a report done on time.  Co-workers told you the latest  rumor—i.e., that is that layoffs are being planned.  You fear the loss of your job.  You are physically and emotionally drained,  angry and frustrated.

You just got home from a tension-filled day at work.  You started cleaning the house and fixing dinner.  Your nine year old son ran through the kitchen over your newly mopped floor and left muddy tracks.  Your teen-ager has his iPod blaring hard rock at top volume from his bedroom.  The TV in the front room is making non-stop chatter.  In the midst of all this your daughter’s teacher called and said that the child needs special help at home.  You feel overwhelmed, bombarded by noise, frustration and negatives.

If these scenarios “hit home”, you are not alone.  At sometime or another all of us feel similar stresses.  It is part of life in this fast-paced environment.  As long as we are alive, stress cannot be avoided.

 PHYSICAL IMPACT OF STRESS

What many of us do not realize is that stress takes a toll not only on our emotions, but also on our bodies.  Like other creatures, our bodies react to danger or stress with inborn responses that have been part of the makeup of humans and animals for as long as can be remembered.  Blood pressure, the rate of breathing, muscle blood flow, metabolism and heart rate increase.  These physical reactions enable the body to respond to “the enemy” with a flight or fight reaction—that is, to flee from the enemy or to fight it.

When our bodies experience these changes over and over in response to stress, it begins to take a toll on physical health.  The impact is illustrated in statistics of highly industrialized nations such as the United States—an epidemic of hypertension (high blood pressure) which triggers hardening  of the arteries, heart attacks and strokes.  These diseases account for 50% of deaths each year in our nation.

 DEALING WITH HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE

A great deal has been published on high blood pressure.  We read about the importance of low fat diets and exercise, and these statements are true.  What is often lacking is an understanding of the third element in prevention of high blood pressure and associated diseases.  We must learn the art of relaxation in order to counter the impact of stress on the body.  Yes, it is possible to do it, but it requires a systematic method and practice.

 THE RELAXATION RESPONSE

 Dr. Herbert Benson, M.D. worked at Harvard University and Beth Israel Hospital in Boston, researching ways whereby we can elicit a relaxation response in our bodies, even in the midst of chaos and stress.  He describes this process in his book The Relaxation Response which can be purchased in paperback at most bookstores.   

At the beginning, then toward the end of each day it is recommended that we practice the “relaxation response”.   Research has shown that this practice faithfully followed enables people to cope far better with stresses which arise during the day.  Dr. Benson outlines some of the basic elements of the practice: 

Place Yourself in a Quiet Environment.  Ideally you should  select a quiet, calm environment with as few distractions as possible—a bedroom or office with door closed, a place of worship or other location where you can be without interruptions for a period of about 20 minutes.

Select a Mental Device to Help You Focus.   When you begin to practice the relaxation response, you typically bring with you a mind filled with stress, activity, frustrations, etc.  You need to quiet this mind.  Select a simple word or two to repeat over and over so as to break distracting and negative thoughts.  For example, you might use “peace” or whatever  word works for you.

Adopt a Passive Attitude.   Our society places emphasis on power and control, being in charge.  However, when we practice the relaxation response, we do just the opposite – put on an attitude of passivity.  We do not need to worry about how well we are performing the technique, but rather adopt a “let it happen” attitude.

Place Yourself in a Comfortable Position.  Most people find that sitting in a comfortable chair with good support is the most effective way to do the practice. 

THE RELAXATION RESPONSE TECHNIQUES

With this introduction, we can now review the steps of the Relaxation Response Technique: 

 Dr. Benson recommends that the Relaxation Response be practiced at least twice daily.  It will require making adjustments to our lifestyles—i.e., finding times and a place to practice it each day. 

OTHER PRACTICES

In addition to the Relaxation Response, there are other things we can do to mitigate stress in daily life.  For example, it is important to learn to laugh at ourselves and not take things too seriously, take vacations when we need them, plan and organize our work more efficiently.    We need to prioritize and define what is really important to us and place those things first—e.g., walk along the ocean, talking to our children, etc. 

WHEN STRESS IS OUT OF CONTROL

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